Safe, Sane and Consensual: BDSM 101 For Dummies

Safe, Sane and Consensual: BDSM 101 For Dummies

16 days ago

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Who hasn't read or watched '50 Shades Of Grey'? In recent years, BDSM has become a very mainstream thing owing to the popularity of the 50 shades trilogy. Those looking for ways to spice up their private life are turning to BDSM sex more often. The Typical Student team learned more on the subject and is ready to tell you about it.

 

What Is BDSM?

 

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BDSM is an acronym used to encompass a variety of sexual activities between two or more consenting parties. The BDSM definition incorporates such activities as bondage and discipline (BD), dominance and submission (SM). Most people think BDSM refers to 'sadism' and 'masochism'. BDSM activities are also referred to as 'play' may not include sexual penetration. Still, this can occur within a BDSM session.

 

How Is BDSM Different From Domestic Abuse?

 

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BDSM is not synonymous to domestic abuse as its main emphasis is consent. The participants of a BDSM session can withdraw at any given point of a session using a safe word or a safe gesture meaning the things are getting too intense.

 

What Is Safeword In BDSM?

 

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In BDSM, a safeword is a word/phrase pre-determined by the parties involved. At that 'no', 'stop' or 'don’t' are rarely used in the session as they can have a playful context. For instance, 'red' or 'yellow' are more commonly used as a safeword instead. 'Red' means the activity must stop right away, meanwhile 'yellow' means things must slow down.

 

BDSM Activities

As we previously mentioned, BDSM comprises of several subcategories such as bondage & discipline, dominance and submission, and sadism and masochism. 

Bondage refers to restraining the partner’s limbs with things like handcuffs, ropes or chains.

Discipline is more about psychological restraints or the use of physical punishment like whipping. 

Dominance and submission are rituals dealing with a mental aspect of BDSM. DS is about giving or receiving control of one partner over another.

In these types of relationships, it is a common thing to lay out a contract that outlines formal consent and the aspects of the BDSM relationship.  

Sadism and masochism (sadomasochism) often refer to physical or emotional pain exchange.

Sadism gives the pleasure to someone who's inflicting pain upon a partner.

Meanwhile, in masochism, the partner gets pleasure from being hurt.

 

Safe, Sane and Consensual

It's a grave misconception thinking that BDSM is all about pain. People practicing BDSM emphasize the importance of safety using such characteristics as “safe, sane and consensual,” or “risk-aware consensual kink.” Basically, this means all aspects of play are discussed for truly informed consent. 

So, what makes BDSM practices so popular? Being open is what makes it flourish. Practicing BDSM in safety and consent can take a relationship between partners to a completely new level and make it more intimate. 

 

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Any questions or propositions?